We all have a basic desire to feel special. We all do things that we think will make other people think we are special. Most of us keep noticing things we have done in the recent past to try and impress some stranger. We realise how stupid we were. We vow never to do it again, and then find we have used a variation of the behaviour on another stranger.
Many new vegans feel that other people will be impressed when they tell them they have gone vegan. They think the other person will perceive them as special. While we believe you are very special for going vegan, and admire your decision, we feel duty bound to tell you that most people you meet will not be in awe of your decision to pursue this new lifestyle. David Foster Wallace wrote a wonderful line in his novel ‘Infinite Jest’ where he said, “You will become way less concerned with what other people think of you when you realize how seldom they do.”
It is a good idea to realise the serving staff in restaurants have zero interest in you personally, your lifestyle, or your reasons for going vegan. Their only interest in you is to serve the food you order. They see you only as respectful or rude. And they have served countless vegans before you turned up in their restaurant. Many of those vegans were polite well-mannered people who treated the serving staff with respect, established what vegan options were available, and were grateful for assistance in making their selections. Unfortunately, a lot of vegans (with far less personality than you) will have been to the restaurant before you and behaved like rude spoilt children.
If you are going out to a restaurant for dinner, it may be a good idea to ring them beforehand and check what vegan options they have on their menu. If you are invited to a friend’s place for a meal, you should tell them in advance what you do and don’t eat. Don’t assume the word vegan has the same meaning to them as it does to you. You may want to offer to bring your own precooked food that only requires heating. The main point here is to make it easy for the other person to cater for you, and don’t confuse their willingness to provide you with a meal as invitation to tell them how special you think you are because you have gone vegan.